Capable: Two Cocks, One Hole

I often struggle with second guessing my abilities, a trait that my husband finds rather frustrating. He will give me a task and I will overthink it, stress over it, get hot about it and call him in a panic and tell him I can’t do it. It’s something we’ve talked about a lot and I have gotten better about in the past few months. I’ve always been a pretty capable person, never wanting society to dictate what I’m able to do and starting new ventures with a certain amount of success. Things have always come pretty easy for me, so it’s surprising that I don’t have confidence in my ability to do certain tasks he asks of me, especially when I know he will be understanding if I can’t. He just wants me to try.

As many of you know, I injured my hand last Tuesday in a rope suspension accident. I was really worried at first, thinking that my day to day life would be severely compromised, wondering how I was going to function. I woke up Wednesday morning feeling really down. It’s hard to not have control over your own body. In, the past week, I have found that I am really quite capable! Even though I don’t have full use of my left hand, I’m figuring out new ways to do things I need to in order to be a functioning adult, and it’s happening pretty quickly and naturally. This little set back I’m experiencing has actually given me a confidence boost. I’ve seen that I can open that jar, I can type a lengthy post mostly free of typos in a reasonable time, and I can pull my hair into a ponytail. It’s a little crooked and messy, but it does the job.

Wednesday afternoon he sent me a text asking me if I was up for a game. Being in the dark mindset that I was, my first inclination was to turn him down, postpone the game for when I was feeling better, but I’d already surprised myself so much that day and I thought, why not? Sure, let’s play a game!

We are going to be re-evaluating your limits tonight. So, in celebration of that, I would like to push you a little further this evening. I sent you four photos yesterday. You must recreate at least one of those photos. If you recreate two, you get two extra orgasms next week, recreate three and you also get a gift. If you can recreate all four, you get the two orgasms, the gift and a very special night out!

I was pumped. The rewards were too sweet to pass up, so I jumped at the challenge even though the photos depicted acts that were physically difficult. It wasn’t anything I wasn’t willing to try though! The photo that challenged me the most was a sexy double penetration, not the one cock in each hole kind of DP though. This was two cocks one hole! It looked hot, it made me hot, but I thought there was no way I was going to be able to do it. I can barely take our largest dildo by itself sometimes. I was hopped up on the idea of prizes and rewards, so I pushed my second guessing to the back of my mind and hiked up my big girl britches. I could do this!

As life always seems to do, it got in the way and we had to push our Sex Olympics back a day. I had a busy Thursday and didn’t have much time to overthink my upcoming tasks. I got ready as instructed and waited for him to get home. While he was in the shower, the negative thoughts started to creep in, cracking away at that reward-induced confidence, staining the excitement that had built up in side me over the past two days. As I washed his back, I told him I was worried, that I didn’t want him to be disappointed in me, and those words were like the first frost of winter, wilting all of the beautiful flowers we’d grown. They were the tiny pebble that causes the devastating avalanche.

I went to the bedroom to lay down while he finished bathing, my thoughts pounding at the door of my psyche. You can’t do this. He will be disappointed. You won’t earn the rewards. By the time he got in the room, my heart was fluttering to the beat of my negative brain, my stomach felt hollow, but I tried to stuff it all down, to hide it.

He started with me on my back, the large dildo inside me, his fingers working their way around it, stretching me. I was tense and it hurt, but I tried to push through, to relax. He could see the pain on my face and offered to switch to a smaller dildo, but I refused. That would be cheating the game, right? How could I earn my reward if I didn’t adhere to the original guidelines? I should have known better, though. This type of play wasn’t going to work like that. We were both obviously not feeling it. I started to get that panicky feeling, the scent of failure was creeping in. I asked him if he had a plan, if he’d thought about how this was going to work. He shrugged his shoulders, and I burst into tears. As an obsessive planner, his casual approach pushed me over the edge. I started babbling on, snot faced and red eyed, my insecurities spilling out of me like lava from a volcano. It wasn’t good or sexy or fun.

Did you think this story was going to have a happy ending? Did you unbutton your pants thinking that my sexy tale of two cocks in one hole would drive your hands between your legs? Well, not all stories have a happy ending. This one might though, there’s still more to tell, so don’t give up yet. I certainly didn’t!

Ten minutes of unnecessary tears, followed by fifteen minutes of separation to clear our heads, another blanket to protect the bedding and lots more lube is what it took. While he was sequestered in the guest room, probably taking deep calming breaths, I laid on our bed with a vibrator, getting my own head back in the game. By the time he came back, I was relaxed in mind and body and ready to try again. He turned me over this time, slathering me and the dildo with lube before working it inside me. I was ready, pushing back into his hand as he fucked me, working fingers alongside the toy. I moaned and ground my hips into the mattress, lost in sensation.

 

I suddenly heard him at my ear. That’s it. Good girl. Take me inside. Yes, you did it. My hazy sex brain came back to reality momentarily. I did it? Yes, you’ve got two cocks in you right now. Good, slut! I didn’t feel the pain of being uncomfortably stretched. I felt full, I felt like I wanted to be fucked and I told him that. He fucked me hard, both him and the dildo slamming into me, his words of encouragement tickling my senses as much as the two cocks filling my cunt. I came in only a few seconds, a new record perhaps, but who’s keeping track in a moment like that. He pulled out of me, spun me around and filled my open mouth with his come as his beautiful grunts and moans filled my ears with happiness.

So, this story did have a happy ending after all! In fact, it had many happy endings. I accomplished all four of my tasks earning all of the prizes. I’ll enjoy those extra orgasms next week, and hopefully I’ll be writing a post soon about my present, a shiny new speculum. And, our very special night out? A trip to the strip club with our good friends and a double lap dance with my husband was a well-earned and very much appreciated reward!

Next time I have a daunting task, whether kinky or work-related or just something life throws at me, I need to remember that second guessing my abilities and allowing negative thoughts to take over do nothing to help me achieve my goals. I am capable.