I am a romantic at heart. I love sappy movies, sweeping gestures of love, and surprises. My husband is also a romantic, although I’m not sure if he knows it or would use that word to describe himself. We’ve talked about what kind of Dom he is, and he always says he the kind that wants to give everyone what they want. It works out for all of us. We get an experience, the support we need or maybe just a good beating, and he gets us, naked, willing, needy. He gets to push us and hold us in his grip, and we get to surrender under his touch. This exchange, while somewhat brutal and intense, is romantic to me. I enjoy getting what I want, whether that is to be pushed out of my comfort zone or encouraged to seek out what I need sexually with other women. He’s given me the perfect kind of romance, the kind that allows me to be slutty and sexual while still feeling cared for and supported.
While I so enjoy being the one who is romanced, I also like to do the romancing. I’m not very good at surprises, and he is a master at figuring things out, putting two and two together and reading my face to reveal every little secret hidden behind it. I still try to surprise him every once in a while, but I’ve learned to keep it simple so as not to spoil it. Now that we are dating other people, I have new victims to surprise with my romantic endeavors.
At first, I wondered if it was proper dating etiquette to be romantic with someone who you were just seeing casually. Where do you draw the line between romance and love? Would it be crossing some sort of line to do something sweet for someone I’m dating? I am who I am, and I realized that if someone I was seeing became freaked out by something, then maybe they weren’t my type of people. So, if I want to buy a souvenir while I’m traveling overseas for someone I’m dating, I will. If I want to draw them a little picture, write them a sweet note, or plan a whole day of sexy fancy fun, I won’t hesitate to do what I want to do.
I think V likes to be spoiled a little bit. Actually, I know she does and, spoiling her is easy because she isn’t high maintenance at all. She likes comfort and soft things, she likes to be warm and cuddled, and she likes a few good orgasms. I wanted to give her a little more, something special that the two of us could enjoy. Sir had an overnight date planned with C to go ride frighteningly fast go carts a couple of hours away, so I invited V over for our own romantic evening. I told her I wanted to do something completely bougie, something that I’d never done before, so I booked a private hot tub for us at a local Japanese spa.
We spent the afternoon cuddling and playing with C’s new pup before I blindfolded her and tied her spread open on the bed and teased her with a Wartenburg Wheel and a soft make-up brush. She licked me and made me come so hard I left a puddle on the bed. It would have been so easy to spend the rest of the evening as we usually do, fingers and legs intwined, snuggled together under the covers, watching tv and talking but we were both really excited about our spa treat.
Neither of us had ever been to a spa before, and this one was understatedly fancy. Tucked up into the mountains, it was hard to find at night. We checked in and went in to the ladies room to shower. I don’t know what I expected, but I didn’t expect to strip down naked in a small room with other women coming and going, so I kind of hesitate. V, always the eager exhibitionist, was naked in a flash, commenting on how much she enjoyed being naked in public.
We got into the shower together, a large sexy space with dark tiles, fancy bath products and a shower head with five different jets that sprayed water on all the important bits. She loves to shower with other people, getting off on the proximity of warm, slippery skin on skin. She reached for me under the rain of hot water and kissed me, her hands roaming down my body, between my legs, over my nipples. I pushed her up against the wall and kissed her, pressing hard against her and holding the hair at the nape of her neck in my hands. She moaned into my mouth right as someone else entered the shower next to us. I hated to stop, but I didn’t want to get kicked out of the place before we even started. We both laughed and got back to getting cleaned and ready for our soak.
Wrapped in white cotton robes and shower squishy sandals, we walked outside to our private salt tub. The attendants had left our bottle of champagne and two plastic flutes on the table for us. It was so romantic, the kind of thing you’d expect to experience on a fancy honeymoon. The cold air licked at our damp skin and we quickly plunged into the hot, swirling water to escape it. Only seconds passed before our hands were on each other again, hands roaming, mouths finding the hollow of a salt water splashed collar bone.
She pushed me back up against the wall and told me to sit on the edge of the tub. Her mouth found my clit as she slipped a finger inside me. I tried to keep quiet as she fucked me, not knowing who might be able to hear us. Soon the cold air got to be too much, and I had to sink back into the warm water. We switched places and I treated her in the same manner. She can come much quicker than I can, especially in public, and I had her clenching down on my fingers in no time, her hips wriggling desperately. She was just about to come when the jets shut off and we were blanketed with silence, no longer hidden by the bubbling water. Sighing with a huff and a giggle as she sank down next to me. She was worried she was being too loud. I know she really wanted to be heard, for it to be proper for her to cry out as she came on my mouth, but again, we’d never done anything like this before and we were afraid to get kicked out.
The rest of the evening, we sipped our champagne, talked, touched, stroked, kissed and took photos of each other. We look so happy in the photos, our cheeks flushed with heat and wine, our bodies and minds relaxed and content. I was disappointed when our time was up and we had to put our robes back on. Being naked with her outdoors in a semi-public place was a rush, and I didn’t want it to end.
We returned to the showers to rinse off, and just as before, we couldn’t keep our hands off each other, our sudsy bodies slipped against each other as we kissed and fondled under the steamy water. We both knew this was just foreplay, the tease of more to come.
What do two sexed up women do after a romantic spa date? They go eat Mexican food! Sitting side by side at the bar, drinking a margarita, munching on tortilla chips and salsa, our hands rubbed each other’s thighs and our shoulders nudged against each other. We laughed, our faces shiny and pink, our hair curled in little tendrils around our faces from the steamy water.
When we got home, we tossed our leftovers in the fridge and walked the dog before we undressed and tumbled onto the couch in our usual position, snuggled side by side, our hands finding soft thighs and needy nipples. After a few drinks, we were both warm and toasty and extra horny. the kind of horny where you just want to be fucked, so that’s what we did. I fucked her doggy style into the couch cushions, one hand thrusting a vibrator into her cunt as she moaned at me to go harder and one hand circled around to her clit. She fucked me with her fingers, her other hand grabbing my hair, scratching my skin, leaving beautiful marks across my breasts and down my back, her mouth biting my thighs, sucking on my neck and nipples.
I woke up the next morning with marks all over my body. Hickies and fingernail scratches, soreness here and there to remind me of her. It made me smile as I pressed my fingers into my throat where hers had been only hours before. It made me feel slutty and romantic all rolled into one.
Romance comes in all shapes. Sometimes it is love letters and flowers, and sometimes it’s two girls naked in a hot tub, working each other up for a sexy slutty fuck later that night. Sometimes it is holding hands in public, holding someone while they cry, or holding your hand over a gasping mouth to quiet them as they come in a semi public place. Sometimes, it’s just staying up late to listen to them talk about life, sharing moments that made them who they are. Romance doesn’t have to be love, it can just be an indication of fond feelings. It’s not about a commitment to forever, but the appreciation of right now.
I will continue my romantic ways, because that’s what I like to do for the people I care about.
Oh, what an amazing night you had! That sounds so fun and intimate. I’m curious where you meet your lovers… I’m just starting out in polyamory and I’m not sure how to find people besides fet, which I’m not having good luck with. Do you consider yourself poly, in that feelings are welcome, or is it more of an open marriage with you and your husband the only ones who should be in love? Sorry for the questions… feel free not to answer if it’s tmi.
No worries! I’m an open book and always willing to chat.
We have met most of our partners through Tinder and other online dating sites. I haven’t met anyone on Fet but that is mostly because my husband and I share a profile. I enjoy not having men approach me there as I know it can be overwhelming for some of my female friends. I know plenty of women who have met partners on Fet, but I do think it is difficult. I honestly enjoy Tinder, but I don’t know if I would if I were dating men. It does get difficult though, because it is so impersonal, people will just drop away after you’ve been talking for weeks. It’s taken some time to navigate the world of online dating without feeling rejected every time someone ghosts. I should probably write a post about what I’ve learned so far!
We consider ourselves ethically non-monogamous but we have different viewpoints on allowing ourselves to venture beyond just friendship and sex. I am more open to welcoming feelings, but I think that has a lot to do with the fact that I only date women. I think it’s easier for women to develop feelings beyond that of a friendship. I know that even before I knew I was bisexual, some of the relationships I had with my female friends were deeper than a friendship even if they weren’t sexual in nature. There was still a romantic vibe. V and I have feelings for each other, but we don’t need to define those feelings. It just is what it is and we enjoy it. I date other women and don’t foresee there being any feelings beyond a fun friendship. My husband has expressed that he doesn’t think he can have deeper feelings for anyone but me, and that he likes maintaining a friendship with his partners that includes sex and kink.
Thank you for such a thoughtful answer! If I had a husband or something, I’d be happy to only date women but that might be a good idea for me to focus on just women for a while. It certainly is interesting being single on fet. Lots of attention but it’s hard to find what I’m looking for. I should try bumble or something.. I’d love it if you posted about what you’ve learned on Tinder. That one scares me.
Haha! Yeah, I like penis but one is enough for me. I’ve never tried Bumble but my husband has had some luck. Tinder isn’t so bad! It seems like it’s only for hook ups, but a lot of people on there are looking for what we all want – connection.
Sounds like a lovely evening. I wish you more of the same.
Thank youuu!
That sounds like a truly amazing night. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on romance versus love in the aways we’re “allowed” to express intimacy for folks we’re seeing more casually. It’s something I’ve been thinking a lot about recently and this is a great piece.
Thank you! It’s been in my mind a lot too because I hear so many of my friends who are in the dating scene talk about how they don’t want to freak someone out or scare them off by being romantic. It’s just another game that I’m not willing to play. Plus, I think it’s important to be intimate and vulnerable in casual relationships as well as more serious ones. I’d love to hear your views on all this. I’ll have to look through your archives lol.
That sounds sublime. Romance can have so many different facets, different meanings, different ways of being expressed.
Thank you! I agree and I’m glad that I’ve been able to recognize that.
What a fabulous night! Sounds very romantic indeed, and you right: romance can take all sort of forms.
It was, thank you!
I both love being romanced and am deeply uncomfortable with it because it’s still so foreign to me (though JB definitely does a good job). And I love taking care of people I love and being taken care of by them. So this speaks to me on a LOT of levels. Also, love that pic!
Oh, isn’t she lovely? I have had to get better about the being romanced part, but the good thing is that my husband romances in a more creative way than your typical flowers and chocolates which makes it easier for me.
I’ve not had any real desire to be with another woman romantically. I had a woman give me an erotic massage but that’s the only time. It sound fabulous though…
Thank you for sharing this. Maybe my bucket list?
Xxx
Naomi